Friday 19th December.
We did our typical morning routine this morning apart
from the fact that I played postie to all the people to whom we send cards as I walked Callie. This was 22
cards! Phew. We gave Sarah one at the pool (if you’ll excuse the expression)
and Sylv in the paper shop. I had left one for the milko along with a note
cancelling the milk for a month. I only hope we don’t get any sent to the house
for the next few days as we will not be able to reciprocate if they went on our
original list and we won’t get to display them either. We are back for a flying
visit early in January – we are seeing Swan Lake at the Lyceum on the 6th.
The plan is to come down on the Sunday and head back on the Wednesday. Mum is
going with us and we’ve persuaded her to stay with us on the Monday and Tuesday
to catch up with her, as we will miss her at Christmas. (She is actually going
to Phil & Jane’s for Christmas Eve until Boxing Day and then is up to Grans
for New Year in Hawick.)
At Uni I had another pile of Christmas cards in my mail.
Where do they all come from? Some of the people who have sent them to me have
just used a Christian name which is absolutely useless for me to tell who the
particular “Jane” or “Tony” are! (Names have been changed to protect the
innocent.) Once again campus was like a ghost town and instead of whizzing off
at lunch time, Laura was at my door by 11 saying, “Shall we go?” So we did. My
car was packed and Callie collected in next to no time and then our two cars
hit the M1 northbound by noon! We were taking Loll’s car back up to Cumbria to
store it at her folks for the winter – she has hardly used it since it was
brought down, so it seems sensible to store it in Molly & Eric huge
garage/shed thingy.
Driving in tandem is weird. Laura went in front and I had
no trouble keeping up with her at all. We went straight to Dad’s and unloaded
our stuff. On arriving at Dad’s, at about 2.40, I was surprised to discover he
and Louisa had put their Christmas tree and decorations up! He’d left a note
(as usual) detailing where the boxes were for putting them all away again after
12th Night and he’d also left a wad of cash in the coffee jar for
incidentals. One of the incidentals was to kennel the dogs for our trip back
home for Swan Lake, with that in mind I phoned the kennel immediately and got
the three of them booked in. Loll and I then walked the pack up Tallentire Hill
and had a sit on the seat to look at the view over the Solway.
It has been very wet up here for the last few days and so
the hounds were horribly muddy when we got back! If it stays this wet we’ll
have to do the drier route, which avoids the places where they love to get
dirty! They don’t like it as much but it means we don’t have to wash four dog
towels after each walk!
A surprise phone call after our meal found us with an
Invitation from Errol to a small bash at his house tomorrow. Errol’s small
bashes can be anything from four people to a hundred! I eagerly accepted for us
both. It is nice to see Errol, he is one of Dad’s oldest chums and is a bit of
a card. The only blot on the landscape might be the fact that Mr Radford is
also coming. (He was Felice’s love interest for a while – about a month,
really. And at Dad’s post wedding beano, in the summer of 2012, I ended up
snogging him for most of the evening and he tried to enter my bedroom after the
guests had retired to bed. Fortunately the alcohol induced libido had worn off
by that time and I had the sense not to f*ck him! I didn’t even let him past
the door.)
Laura puts it down to the Arkwright phase of my life,
where my legs were “open all hours”. She is not far from the truth, TBH.
For this evening we whizzed down into Workington to see
the Hobbit 3 again. It is even better the second time. There are still so many
little touches that you miss the first time of seeing it. While we were there
we booked to see Paddington on the Christmas Eve matinee. I know it’s a kids’
film but I used to hoot out loud at the books when I was about 7 or 8. I still
have affection for the little bear and I still have two duffle coats. I don’t
have a floppy hat though. Paddington doesn’t, of course, take the pole ursine
position in my heart; that is reserved for a certain bear of little brain with
a fondness for honey.
We hit the charp quite tired, after a busy afternoon,
evening and a second walking of the pack. Laura is definite we must visit her
folks first thing in the morning, so we can take her car. It has dried off
thorough in Dad’s garage and if it’s not raining in the morning she’ll drive it
round.
Saturday December 20th
We toyed with going swimming in Cockermouth first thing
but then decided against it. The pool can be packed with too many people in the
first session as it doesn’t open at 6am like the one we go to in Sheffield.
Instead, after brekkers, I persuaded Loll to give me a tow on my roller blades
when she drove round to her folks. She was a bit wary at first but in the end
she agreed. The village is usually so quiet I was sure we’d not have a problem.
It was brilliant. I was a bit wary in case she pulled
away with a jerk but she was smoothness itself and I was able to wheel along
behind her on the length of tow rope fastened to the loop on the back of the
car. As we got to the end of the one way bit I made frantic gestures to her to
go round the whole circuit again, so she did. There was a really awkward moment
where we hit the churned up surface at the start of the one way system and I
nearly fell over (they really do need to resurface this bit of road).
Fortunately, I am no novice on the blades (even though I haven’t used them for
a while) and I was able to keep my footing. I certainly made the heart pump
faster and got the adrenaline going.
At the end of the one way system I again made more
signals for her to a do yet another circuit, so we whizzed round the corner.
She stopped really abruptly as we had met a bloody tractor and trailer coming
the wrong way round the one way system! With my momentum I let go of the towing
rope and wheeled up to the tractor driver’s door, greeting him with a friendly,
“What the f*ck are you doing driving the wrong way round here?”
He replied with, “What the f*ck are you doing being towed
on a public road on roller blades?” Touche, I thought. We had a brief exchange
of unpleasantries before Laura backed up the nearby big house’s access road and
we let the twat past. The experience of almost hitting a vehicle driving the
wrong way round a one way system had shaken Loll up a bit so I whipped off my
boots and drove us barefoot to her folk’s house.
Molly could see Loll was a bit shaken up so I explained
we had nearly run into a tractor and trailer going the wrong way round the one
way system. She said that the idiot farmer does it all the time, his excuse is
he can’t turn his tractor into the farm drive as they are too big! They never used
to be too big, the parsimonious cnut just won’t pay to have his drive way
altered, which is what it needs now he has bought these f*ck-off big tractors.
It made me wonder if the size of the tractor was to make up for his tiny penis!
Molly thought this was hilarious and is going to ask him the next time they see
him in the pub!
Laura dug out her roller blades and we walked up Tall
Hill to the seat and then put our on blades to whizz down again. It was
brilliant. A bit scary over the bumpy bits in the road and there were two
humungous potholes we had to avoid but otherwise it was so much fun, I wonder
why I haven’t done it before?
Errol’s small bash was about thirty people big. Michael
had a lady on his arm as he arrived, which was a relief. It meant he wouldn’t
attempt to persuade me that what I needed was a nice cock inside me instead of
Loll’s fingers. He has tried this before only to be surprised at getting a
dousing in whatever drink I happened to have in my hand. I think the first time
he thought it wasn’t deliberate; the second time he knew for sure it was. Of
course, since then he has slept with Felice, which was probably a bit too
exciting for him as the woman on his arm was almost his age (at a guess).
Errol had done another of his killer punches. It is
usually lethal in large quantities. It was in a huge wine cooler which he had
picked up at an antique fair somewhere, it would have held about four cases of
wine in their bottle plus ice, so god only knows what the volume of his punch
was. All I can say in my defence was we were walking home afterwards and I have
always been known to not refuse a little drinkie. I suppose having a huge
buffet meal would have helped to absorb some of the alcohol’s effects.
It was probably the excess of alcohol which persuaded
Laura to agree to let me lick her out in one of the bedrooms. Inevitably this
meant she had to do the same to me, so we ended up 69ing each other to orgasm
on Errol’s spare bed. Luckily we weren’t disturbed by anyone but it did add to
the excitement, the possibility we may be discovered in flagrante! I don’t
think we had been missed by anyone when we reappeared in the kitchen for a
refill of the punch.
We decided to troop back home at about 2pm and hit the
charp. I simply let the dogs out into the paddock for their final romp and call
of nature which meant I could be in and snuggled with Laura pretty pronto. We
didn’t actually get to sleep until about 3 o’clock!
Sunday 21st Dec
Grotty weather this morning which put paid to a walk up
the hill with the pack but I figured it may be drier down at Allonby so after
dressing swiftly I left the Lollster having a lie-in and drove Dad’s new tank
down to the coast. Sure enough it wasn’t raining here at all. The tide was
coming in though so we had to walk on the foreshore and along the new cycle
path, rather than on the beach. Being a Sunday I was expecting it to be a bit
busier than it was, although it was only 9.40 when we arrived (we’d both had a
lie-in) there were very few cars or people about. The dogs like the coastal bit
and find plenty to sniff at, plus I got to visit Twentyman’s and buy some old
fashioned sugary sweets. A win win situation.
A look at our supplies meant we should go and do a food
shop, so after a snack lunch we headed for Asda at Workington, which was
absolutely heaving – even the car park! We bought enough food to feed an army
for a few months and then headed back home. Loll’s big sister and hubby were at
Molly & Eric’s so we went round there for tea and had a silly game of who
am I? You know where you have a post it on your forehead with the name of
someone famous on it. You have to guess who you are by asking questions. I was
able to narrow down that I was a black American male singer from the 1980s. I
have no idea who Lionel Ritchie is, even though they tried to tell me all about
him when my 20 questions were up! I suppose it would have been like me writing
Rene Descartes on one of my post-its for them!
After a scrumptious tea we all trooped back to Dad’s to
watch Frozen on DVD, except for Molly’s big sister who said the most idiotic
thing I have heard anyone say in a while: “I won’t watch it with you. It is on
Sky later in the week and I would rather watch it in High Definition” What a
moronic statement. I was going to let fly with a string of choice sarcastic
comments but Laura caught my eye and shook her head; she mouthed, “It’s not
worth it.” So I didn’t bother.
Those who hadn’t seen it before thought it was lovely. I
still think the singing is terrible, all nasal and whiny and rather Johnny
One-note like. Stephen wasn’t impressed, TBH, but then I suppose it is more of
a girls’ film than a boys.
Through the film, we crunched our way through several
bags of nuts, crisps, hoops; and doritos, and we drank four bottles of wine!
They all then had some fresh coffee using Dad’s Expresso machine and some trifle
before wandering off to their respective homes. The kitchen looked like a bomb
had hit it! I spent a good hour tidying and cleaning up again afterwards. We
have, maybe, foolishly invited Molly, Eric and Stephen to have Christmas lunch
with us. They made a reciprocal offer for Boxing Day when the whole clan will
be there. So I can make mess at someone else’s house (in high definition)!
We hit the charp quite early after our late night at
Errol’s and the dogs had to be content with a romp in the paddock, again! I
promised them a fell walk if the weather cleared up though.
No comments:
Post a Comment