Two Romeo and Juliets in two weeks... Greedy?

October 2nd to October 18th 2015...

My first day of picking up of the new shooting season happened to coincide with our next night of our Classical Concert subscription, so I thought we may be pressed for time. As it happened I needn’t have fretted as we had finished by early afternoon. One thing that made me feel really pleased was the fact that Callie was sent after a runner and didn’t disgrace me by killing it once she had picked it up. [This is something she had been known to do in the past and it is considered really bad form…]

Our first concert in the month was at the City Hall, with Mum & Tony (who is really becoming more of an Arts aficionado than I expected). Because the weather was still unseasonably mild I wore a summery dress for the occasion. The Orchestra was The BBC Philharmonic and they had put together a rather populist programme for their first concert of the season.

Owing to the fact that the weather was so mild I decided to go in one of my new clingy summer dresses. It was a rainbow hooped long jersey dress, with scooped neck. It does fit rather well around the bodice and I wore a seam-free bra and pants set which doesn't show against the fabric. On top of it I had my cropped denim jacket and wore sort of wedge espadrille type sandals which brought me up to about 5'11". It made me tower over Tony, which was part of the effect I was wanting. Mum said I would probably need to put it away in my wardrobe from next week, as the weather is supposed to be turning autumnal. I hope she's wrong.

On my jacket I have a pink badge with black handwriting which requires you to be very close to read it, it says: "How dare you presume I'm heterosexual!" Tony read it and laughed. When I ordered interval drinks in the bar a guy read it too and said I bet "I could make you hetero" to which I instantly replied, "Not if I kick your balls up through your stomach". He looked stunned. Laura dragged me away with a whispered, "Come on..."

The concert was wonderful. The R&J Overture was a favourite from when I was a little girl - you will have heard it I'm sure. The Mozart Horn Concerto must be the most played Horn Concerto on the planet (no 4) and the playing of the horn was excellent. Very expressive.

If Beethoven hadn't written any more symphonies after the Eroica he would still have been considered a genius at the form. I absolutely loved it. There is a great film about it being played for the first time which you should look out. I can't remember its name at the mo... I think it may just be called "Eroica".

The Sunday after the concert was still fine (Oct 4^th) so we whizzed into the White Peak and did some Limestone climbing. It is trickier than climbing on grit but the place we went, in Miller’s Dale has several pre-chocked routes which are quite challenging. There is one really severe overhang which Laura simply didn’t attempt. She is not used to the difference in holds and technique required for this kind of manoeuvre. She was so relieved when I put in my appearance ‘round the corner’ I was rewarded with a huge kiss!

My Mentoring of the undergraduate cohort continues. I have a curious bunch of freshers, some of whom seem so wet behind the ears I want to hug them and tell them ‘It’ll be alright, honest..’. We do have the usual quota of stupidly cocky males who really do need takin down a peg or three. I am amazed by the arrogance of a couple of them in particular.

By the end of today (October 9^th) I was have seen 25 of my tutees! Not bad in one week, eh? Especially as I am allocating them all half an hour. OK, some of them have been in and out in a flash (2 were like cats on a hot tin roof the whole time) and a couple went on for almost an hour. I have met all sorts of brilliant and hopeless people this week. I have made a bet with Laura as to who will have left (or been asked to leave by Christmas). She thinks I am being too harsh...

Her first week as a Post Grad has gone down really well. Today was a weird day in that Laura had the day at the solicitors and I have a full day at Uni. That is a first; usually we have been together at both places.

Tonight's entertainment was R & J at the Crucible, along with Mum & Tony. He really is becoming more interested in 'the Arts' or (this is cynical me speaking) it makes it easier for him to get in Mum's pants. If only he knew how much she was looking for sex... (I know this because when we got drunk together in Margaret River [2013]  she told me she hadn't had sex since she and Dad split up, and she was keen not to have 'it' close up on her! We made a pact the next day never to mention again what we had talked about. Good job really as I told her all about a sexual experiment Rick and I had done.

Romeo and Juliet. You may have heard of it. It was a very modern production set in what could have been a rundown area of any big city. Opened with a chavvy looking guy sat in one of those white plastic garden chairs with a music player thingy and a can of beer...

The 'Fuss' surrounding it was Freddie Fox - he played Romeo. He is one of the acting Foxes. (Now his sister Emilia and I could get something on I'm sure...)

He had completely cut glass diction, which seemed at odds at first, especially as Juliet had a soft Welsh accent. I suppose it was a way to emphasise the difference between the families. At times he did look very young indeed.

In places the modern setting didn't quite work, sometimes that happens.

Absolutely the best actor was The Nurse. She was absolutely brilliant. Oh, and they made the priest female... I know this makes it sound like a staged version of Baz Lurhmann's Romeo + Juliet (Leonardo di Caprio & Claire Danes) but it wasn't trying to copy that at all. Despite di Caprio being in it, it does remain one of the best filmed versions of the play. At times he looks like he can act. Unlike, say 'Titanic', where he was so wooden I was surprised he sank at the end... Sorry - huge digression - wrists duly slapped!

Owing to the fact we are whizzing to Australia over Christmas I have had to get my Chrimbo Present buying sorted before we go. I bought half a dozen pressies for my baby sister and nephew and nieces yesterday. I also found an amazing brooch and pendant for Mum made from Swarovski Crystal. It was a bit expensive (£150) but they look gorgeous. I know she loves Swarovski, so it should be good. I have also bid on e-bay for a vintage tool set for Tony - I have gone up to £60 - I'll have to see if I win it. It was a bit more than I wanted to spend on him. [PS on the tool kit – it went for over £100. Phew, good job I put in a maximum bid…]

October 16th

I have completed all my mentees' initial interviews with 50+ this has now become a bit of a marathon. I had a long and seriously useful chat with my PhD supervisor, she joined the growing chorus of people who tell me I shouldn't worry about getting a job after I have finished. They aren't on my side of the fence though...


We whizzed off up to Dad's on Friday lunchtime to see the Hallé at the Sands Centre in Carlisle on Friday night. We bought student tickets only £10!. It meant we had to take pot luck with the choice of seats but the hall is very good for views and acoustics. The programme was: Rossini -The Silken Ladder Overture;
Tchaikovsky - Violin Concerto; Vaughan Williams -Symphony No. 2 "London". I had never heard the Silken Ladder so that was good. The Tchaikovsy was the best thing on the programme.

Before the show we went into the huge pub next door, The Turf Tavern, for some grub. I am afraid I succumbed to my inner chav and had a plate of Scampi and Chips. I know, I know... They were just what I fancied and they were delicious. Plus my plate was piled with 16 pieces of these tasty crustaceans, I can't remember getting as much on my plate (apart from the pub across the Solway in Carsethorn, which served me 30 one time! I think the pub is the Lifeboat). Even better than the amount of food was the price: this mega meal only cost £7.50. We will be back for more when there are other concerts.

We went to the Plaza Cinema to see "Suffragette", in Workington, on the Saturday afternoon. We also performed some retail therapy again in the town before the show as I still had some pressies to buy for the folks back in the UK whilst we are in Aus for Christmas & New Year. Suffragette made me feel very angry. Yes, it is moving and poignant and all that, Emily Davison's martydom for the cause was obviously what turned the tide in favour of us getting the vote but far too many men are still in positions of power today. We are still discriminated against by misogynist and patriarchal societies around the globe, even here in the 'so called' liberated UK. Don't get me started on Saudi Fucking Arabia!!

Dad, Louisa and Chloé are stayed in Lancaster all weekend, they had a formal function on Saturday night and it made more sense to use the flat rather than do a 180 mile round trip. He got an undergraduate as babysitter ( this news sent warning bells ringing in my head, I do hope that isn't Deja Vu!). Callie was a bit lost when we arrived as normally there are three mad dogs to play with, but as Dad and Co were in Lancaster, so we were the mutts. She even went and sat outside by their kennel and run as if waiting for them to come home!

We told him that we were going to have a really wild party on Saturday night, LOL. I don't think he believed us... In fact we went to Kate and Simon's for a meal instead. Kate is an old school chum of Laura's and during the course of the evening she claimed that she knew Laura was gay all the way through school. It was obvious that she was lying, though, as she could provide no evidence to back up her statement. I have met them once before in Cockermouth with their little girl Kirsten. They were surprised by what I did for a living, once again people can't get past the blonde hair! Afterwards Laura told me how much money they had coming into the home, I was appalled. They were getting just about what I used to earn when I was doing my Master's, and bringing up a daughter. By way of redistributing the wealth a little, I took a German Case of wine with us for the meal (mixed whites and reds) from Dad's extensive cellar. He won't miss them! 

We drove back during the afternoon on the Sunday ready to face the onslaught of a new week at work refreshed, invigorated and a little shagged out after being able to make love all over the house whilst Dad and Louisa were away. (I hope he hasn't set up hidden security cameras in the place or we truly are fucked!

Giving the Vet a hard-on.

Monday 21st September to Friday 2nd October.

Term has begun much as usual really. As per the norm there was no sign of a certain wandering Frenchwoman - I really don't know how she gets away with it, I really don't. If I was as tardy and unpunctual I am sure I would have been shown the door. [There's the door!]

All in all a pretty quiet week to begin with, as happens sometimes. The two West Australian AFL teams both had the weekend off as they won their first match and didn't need to got through the repecharge system - although maybe a week off was too much for some, as I will explain later.

At Uni I had a bit of a crisis of confidence as I realised that after this year, that is it. Full stop. End of my days as a student. This was completely overwhelming and I even began to well up a little. I called Dad at his Uni and was put through immediately (which is a first - I usually get an irritated woman telling me he is in a lecture or a tutorial or a meeting). I did actually blub down the phone to my Dad so he told me off and made me go onto Skype so we could see each other.

It is actually streets better seeing the person you are talking to when you are upset, even if you can't hug them. He was calm and sensible and gave me reassuring words. He spoke about climbing and how, when I was stuck I didn't give up and abseil back down, I would look around for an alternative route. He made me promise to come up to Cumbria this coming weekend to have a hug and so we could watch the AFL Semi-finals together.

He even said he'd send me a few copies of the Times Higher Education magazine which are chock full of jobs. I just love him so much.

On the tram home I told Loll this and I kissed her. Some grumpy old git behind us exclaimed, in a voice that could have been heard in Bognor, "Well, really!". So Laura turned around and said, "Yes, really!" and she proceeded to give me a really passionate snog there and then; tongues and all. I hope the old git died of apoplexy!

I called Mum when we had finished our evening meal and she told me I wasn't surgically attached to my house! That was a bit of a shock. I do love this place. It is my first ever house and I have lavished lots of love and attention on it. She did tell me all about the moving she and Dad did and how it was upsetting to move but each new place seemed better than the last. I can't quite imagine that about my little house. I tried using the uncertainty of the long distance relationship tack with her but she was able to counter that reminding me that Loll and I had conducted the early stages of our love affair when we lived over 100 miles apart.

A little while after this Dad sent an e-mail with a list of all the Higher Education places offering degree courses within a 50 mile radius of my house. There are masses. Good old Dad!

We sneaked away from Uni at lunchtime on Friday to get to Dad's before he Louisa and Chloé got home from Lancaster. We had a meal already cooking for them when they arrived and I kidnapped Chloé for a stroll round the village while they got themselves sorted out. Molly and Eric were pleased to see me and my baby sister (half) and they were even more pleased to be invited to the Food fair in Cockermouth on Saturday. It is quite unusual for Eric to be home at the weekend. We arranged to pick them up at about 10 am - to avoid the crowds.

AFL:  Arrggghhh! Gloom and doom. The Dockers got their arses severely kicked by Hawthorn - again. It was really quite upsetting, Ironically, it ended up being Dad who needed the hug after the game! We watched it in the family room with Dad and I sprawled on the corner sofa, snuggled up under his left arm. Laura was snuggled under my left arm and Louisa and Chloé completed the picture under Dad's right arm. [Sultan in his harem?]

The game was tense and fraught and not without incident and controversy but the Hawks lead at the end of each quarter and we were well and truly stuffed. This has happened so many times this season, we go into a match as favourites and get beaten. The Hawks scored 15.4 = 94 points to the Dockers feeble 10.7 = 67 points. (The figures are 'goals' - 6 points; 'behinds' - 1 point and the over all total.) Fyfe even broke his leg during the game!

On the Saturday I kidnapped Chloé and we drove Laura's Mum & Dad and the kidnp victim into Cockermouth. There were far more stalls for the Food Fair this year than last and we tasted and sampled loads of things. We had a mega chat with a lady from Haverigg Prison, near Millom, who runs a rehabilitation scheme for the prisoners there by means of a smokehouse. There are usually a couple of trustees on the stall with her but she explained they bad been naughty boys and had their privileges suspended. We bought a few packets of her smoked items for our evening meal [they were delicious, btw]. As a consolation for Dad I bought him a bottle of the Lakes Distillery's 'One Gin'. I have some of their 'One Whisky' but as a new convert to gin I have started sampling this ruination of mothers. LOL

It was nice. Not as earth shatteringly brilliant as Tanqueray10 but a close second. We downed a series of glasses mixed with tonic and citrus slices as we watched with horror The Budgies beat North Melbourne. OH NO - nightmare scenario enacted: Docker lose, Budgies win. They could go on to win the bloody Premiership next Saturday! Despite having six tumblers full of G & T I didn't feel intoxicated at all.

On the Sunday, which was another gorgeous day, I dragged everyone - Dad, Louisa, Laura and Chloé to Lorton Valley. I drove us in Dad's car so we could take the wolf pack too. Parking at the foot of Rannerdale Knotts we ambled up the valley to the hause between the Knotts themselves and the start of the Grasmoor path then dropped down into the village of Buttermere. I carried the baby in its papoose all of the way until we got to the cafe in the village. Louisa took her to the loo to change her and then carried her the rest of the way back to the car.

We walked past the north shore of Crummockwater and the fossilised dinosaur tail of rocks that extend out in to the water. It isn't really a fossil, that was just my childhood name for them and it has stuck.

Sauntering along the shore I had a longish chat with Louisa about the baby and stuff and she said she was delighted to be able to get back into a lot of her favourite clothes again. She wasn't exactly a large person to begin with and I used to wonder how someone so skinny could manage to pop out two babies without causing herself serious injury. (Cheryl, her oldest is the same as Laura but she and Mum don't get on!) The walk was a good way of her seeing how her fitness levels had returned too. The only thing she really needed now was getting Dad to have sex with her as often as they did before! Well, please... That was a conversational gambit too far, IMHO. I changed the subject. It is really weird hearing your parent's sexual habits discussed. It is definitely something I don't wish to repeat any time soon!

We almost drove round to the Kirkstile Inn for lunch but in the end we didn't. Dad found out later in the week it was packed out, a combination of the gorgeous weather and the Food Fair in Cockermouth bringing the locals out. Dad knows the owner and he told him that some people at the bar got a bit fractious as the two staff serving/taking orders got swamped. When I worked as a barmaid in Cambridge I used to hate it when the bar was busy. People could get really unpleasant if they thought you had served someone who was after them in the queue (scrum, usually).

After lunch we made a leisurely return to Sunny Sheffield (it was sunny too) so we could get an early night to be primed to watch the eclipse of the moon. At three oh five my alarm went off and we trooped out in to the back garden to see the moon starting to be totally obscured by the Earth's umbra. Total coverage came at about 3.25 and we witnessed the orange disc created by this exceedingly rare phenomenon. It was a bit chilly, standing in the garden in our dressing gowns and I said so. Laura said she knew how to warm me up and began to inveigle her naughty fingers under my dressing gown and then into a warmer place of my own. It had the desired heating up effect, as it always does, and we decide to adjourn back inside where I could play hide the fingers too. Plus we were a little worried in case any of our neighbours were secret watching the eclipse too, from the comfort of their own windows and could see exactly what those two blonde girls we doing under the blood red moon.

It was almost five when we attempted sleep again. We were both a hell of a lot warmer, though!

The same night I encountered my ex-boyfriend at the Vet's as it was Callie's booster time again. The receptionist (Hannah) told me the news that Alan (the aforementioned vet) was getting married! There was a turn up. I almost cancelled the appointment after I realised who the receptionist told me I'd be seeing but I thought it would seem pretty strange to phone straight back and do so, it would wouldn't it? Plus, it was the last appointment of the evening, so cancelling that would have meant choosing another day.

Alan was Mr Professional during the consultation and afterwards he told me his news. His bride to be is called Gail, he did tell me what she did for a living but my mind was off wandering... Why had we not reached that stage in our relationship? Why didn't we have sex until after I had dumped him?

The cheeky bugger interrupted my reverie and asked if he could steal a kiss for old time's sake. My mind was going Nooooo! My mouth just kissed him. The naughty man then tried to put his tongue in my mouth... Once again the mind and body were out of sync and I responded in kind. After a minute of eating each other's faces I could feel an insistent bulge pressing against my tummy. I pulled back and said, "Down boy. down!"

He accused me of being responsible for the bulge and that I could always do something about it if I wanted. Boy did I want... It would have been so easy to have unzipped him and taken that firm sausage into my mouth again. I have done it many times before [when we were a couple, not at theVet's!]; luckily common sense prevailed and I pulled away. I told him I thought it would be better if I saw Maxine in future and left.

Sitting in the car I couldn't help but wonder why he had been so forward and what that meant for the security of his marriage with the unfortunate Gail. I did feel as guilty as hell for snogging him though. I mean, what a stupid, stupid, stupid thing to do! I need my head examining at times.

The wayward Felice arrived during the week demanding to know where I had been. The cheeky madam. I told her I had been in the usual spots with my phone at all times. She countered saying that every time she called she got a strange tone. The dozy cow has a new i-phone six and has somehow transposed two of my numbers. No wonder she couldn't get through. She edited her contacts list and, hey presto, was able to ring me from one seat in the SCR to the other!

She wanted to contact me because she is single again. (No surprise there...) I assume she wanted a shoulder to cry on, metaphorically, and it was my fault that she had mistyped my number!

I have been given the new list of undergrad mentees for this year, I now have over 50 of them, spread over the three years. I e-mailed my newbies and my old stagers and arranged meetings with them during the next fortnight. I started with the freshers on Friday. They look even younger than ever! The usual mixture of bravado, arrogance and shyness, over-topped with a feeling of awe at meeting a 'staff member' who will be their mentor. A couple of the guys seemed really obnoxious, I hope they calm down during the semester.

One girl reminded me of Mandy, my wall flower fresher who became a limpet for a while. This one was very shy and nervous and when she left gave me a hug and a peck on the cheek. Ahem! She's called Lucy, is from North Wales and has that sing-song way of speaking that some Welsh people have. She is doing Art or Art History or something along those lines. She reminded me, a bit, of my niece Annabelle. She had that same naive enthusiasm mixed with worry about not fitting in or getting things wrong or people not liking her.

The rest of the week was the usual mix of Uni and Work and swimming and dog walking. We did manage to fit in going to rock on one evening when we finished early. Just onto Stanage Edge. The weather was so good, it was an opportunity not to be missed.

A final note, Steve has asked me if I am OK to do some picking up on Saturday. I agreed but I'll be cutting it fine as we have a concert at the City Hall in the evening. The money has gone up to £75 for the day, which is a pleasant surprise, and two birds if enough are shot. Luckily I didn't invite Mum & Tony over for a meal before the concert as it may have been cutting things a bit fine.

Words on the concert; the picking up and our Girl Dining Club meal in the next post.

The snogging incident of Maia on the tram.

Monday 14th September to Sunday 20th.

Last week at XXX & Y full time. Loll has about 25 hours, altogether, sorted out so her wage is going up pro-rata. She is very pleased about that, she thought the cut from full time would be a bit drastic (although she has simply been putting the difference into her back account so she wouldn't have missed it). He University hours are 16 so she'll be fine.

I am keeping my same split as before which suits both me, and my two locations fine. I am now going to engage my brain on looking for what to do next year when my RA post expires.

We had our September dining club night on Tuesday at Sarah's. She did amazing things with pork, cider and apples. Usually pork can be very dry, this was delicious.

For dessert we kept the apple theme as she'd made a version of my apple cake, which was just as good as mine.

They were all fascinated by our accounts of Arran and trying to spot otters. We didn't tell them about Heather and Andrea though. I think we may have persuaded some of them a visit to Scotland in Miniature could be worthwhile.

Once again we were the only ones going to the theatre this week. I was appalled by how few of them had even heard of The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time, never mind actually read it! I often think I am a separate species of life on the planet. I keep talking about stuff and getting looks from other people which scream, "What the F is she on about?" Laura used to have the same expression when we were younger but she has tuned in to Radio Maia and now sings from the same hymn sheet - well, almost.

Laura broached the concert by the Hallé which did relieve some of the weirdness quotient from around my shoulders I suppose although there again nobody had heard of Glinka and only a few of Rachmaninov! It prompted Helen to say, "You two really are well suited aren't you?" I am not sure if it was an insult or a compliment. When I asked Loll about it afterwards she thought it was definitely a compliment.

The concert was excellent. As it always is with the Hallé. We had new seats in the Circle this time, I fancied a change. It puts us looking over the violins and, crucially, down onto the keyboard when there is a piano in use. This proved useful for the Rachmaninov Third Piano Concerto, with Sunwook Kim tinkling the ivories. I loved his expressive and sympathetic playing. Since winning the Leeds he has grown in stature so much. This followed on from the Ruslan and Ludmilla overture and the other Rachmaninov piece, his extremely romantic Third Symphony. I am always surprised that a 20th Century composer could be so lyrical in his writing, unlike so many who feel they have to break with musical traditions and produce works which are deliberately grating to the ear. Oh dear, I sound like a boring old fart... LOL

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time was one of the best things I have seen at the theatre anywhere, ever! It kept very closely to the book but was a very avant garde staging, with the set leading you to expect something sci-fi like. It was a series of grids which lit up like large pieces of graph paper. The only props were a set of boxes which the cast shifted about when needed. Christopher was excellent. He seemed a bit old for the age of the character when you first met him but he was so convincing as an autistic teenager you soon forgot that. They had reworked the character of Siohban to be much more prominent and she sort of helped move the story along. The ensemble were very cleverly used, especially in the sequence when Christopher is looking at the stars being carried on the upstretched arms of the rest of the cast. I loved the way, at the end when Christopher came back up to explain a maths conundrum to the audience - half of them were already leaving. It was a really clever touch.

My resident Maths genius was completely stunned by the whole thing and she vowed to go and read the book again when we got back home. She spent a lot of Sunday doing just that!

If you get the chance to see this production jump at the chance; you will be stunned by it. Seriously.

Sunday lunch was spent at Mum's where we discussed the show again and Tony, who had accompanied Mum to the show with us, was completely amazed by the whole thing. he hasn't been much of a theatre goer up to now [why the hell not?] but I think this show may make him more inclined to want to go some more. This can only please Mum, too.

First Day of the new semester tomorrow... Oh Heck.

Mega Catch Up with Maia (We've been away...)

July, August & Sept (up to 13th Sept)

After the cricket match I learn that Dad has bought tickets to see Spock’s Beard in Nottingham; it'll be just him and me as Louisa and Laura have both cried off. Louisa claims their music is just too fiddly.

End of July we had Laura’s pre-arranged Magical mystery tour to Skipton.

Lollster took me away for the weekend for the last weekend in July! OK it was the 31^st of July and the  1st August.

She just said pack some stuff and get in the car! Forceful, or what?

She wouldn't tell me where we were going, despite my repeated asking on the journey.

We pitched up at a B & B between Skipton and Settle. Two beds. She'd booked us a twin bedroom (just in case).

It was a dog friendly place and Terry (the owner) fell in love with Callie. (Terry’s full name is Theresa.)

We dined at the local pub for our evening meal and walked round the little village. It was really cute.

On Saturday she'd booked tickets for the Settle to Carlisle Railway, from Settle to Appleby. We caught the train before 10 and spent a few hours exploring Appleby. It reminded me of Durham being settled in a big bend in the river. Lunch was at a dog friendly pub in the town. We caught the train back to Settle and then drove up the line (which we'd ridden along) to look at the Ribblehead Viaduct. It is quite awe inspiring. It looks nothing from the train but is amazing from below.

We had another meal out in the same pub and then shared the other bed, just so that both were messed up. I think Terry would have been cool with our lesbianism but there have been such stories in the news….

Sunday we had a canal boat ride from Skipton, it was brilliant. Really sunny and peaceful. The day just drifted slowly by and it was as though we hadn’t a care in the world for the three hours on the boat.  I think I am hooked on having a holiday in one.

Richard and I did enquire about how much buying a cabin cruiser would cost. A good one with two bedrooms and an outboard, rather than an inboard motor, was about £10K upwards. If all had gone to plan and we'd stayed in Cambridge as a happy family we'd probably have bought one. The canal ride brought back all those happy boating memories.

I was a puntstress for a while on the Cam. I used to work for a firm which operated near Magdelene Bridge (although I think they have all been taken over by one company now). The wages weren't so good but the tips were. Especially if you could tell the punters (pun intended) all about Cambridge: Mathematical Bridge; King's College & the Choir; Trinity and Lord Byron; rowing and the annual bumps etc. They loved it. They especially liked the idea of a real undergraduate punting them along the river.

I used to lay it on thick about women being denied an education and how I was a member of the first ever all women college - even though when it was founded I wouldn't have been allowed a degree. People used to be gobsmacked by the idea. But I digress (blown off course, LOL).

We headed back to Sunny Sheff until Friday, then we were up to dad's on Aug 7th over to Arran on 8^th – 9.45 ferry. I had my tablet and live streaming of the cricket on at work on Thursday 6th and watched the amazing morning’s play at Trent Bridge, where England bowled Australia all out for just 60!

I was totally overwhelmed (so was Australia). My Dad was heartbroken when we arrived on Arran on Saturday.

I have never seen or heard of a side being bowled out before lunch in a test. It was truly gobsmacking. I kept exclaiming out loud when we took a wicket and by the time they were all out everyone in Archives was around my tablet computer. Good job my tablet is 4G.

Rah rah rah.

Dad had a mini surprise for us this weekend. He's taken out a subscription to watch the AFL 2015 Season and Grand Finals. So we watched the Budgies get stuffed on Saturday evening (the Budgies is our nickname for the West Coast Eagles) and on Sunday night we saw Fremantle Dockers (our team) beat the crap out of St Kilda. He has given me his password so I can watch the Dockers vs Budgies game next weekend, on my laptop. My mobile phone company is the same as Dad's so it should work 

OK. I sort of knew he had subscribed but didn't expect him to be generous with the user name and password. Good old Dad, eh? The only downside is how much of my 15Gb watching the game will use up.

We had a meal out with Dad, Louisa and Chloé at the Kildonan Hotel on the Saturday night after the game as a celebration and consolation (cricket) and I found myself falling asleep at the table after we’d eaten. Good job Dad had driven round from Whiting Bay.

We had a lazy Sunday just chilling at the van and drinking half a bottle of Tanqueray 10 gin with tonic. It is Dad’s new passion, and I can’t say I blame him. It’s delicious. I drown the gin in tonic, but even so it is surprisingly refreshing with a slice of lemon and lime and a heap of ice. I am not normally a gin drinker but I could get used to this…

We waved Dad, Louisa and Chloé off from the van about half an hour before they are caught the 11am Ferry back to Ardrossan. We stayed put as it was raining, although the rain seemed to have moved off north to be over the fell tops, leaving Whiting Bay grey and damp from the down pour we had. Luckily I walked Callie before it rained.

Whilst surfing on the net at Whiting Bay, I found this item on the net, isn't it gorgeous?

https://www.ikrix.com/gb/carnation-print-dress-dolce-gabbana-8600

Shame about the price. I just love it. I will have to see if Mai-Lay at Uni can knock up a copy. She is a Graphic Design and Textiles student (undergraduate) who is one of my Personal Tutees and is brilliant at making clothes. She has been doing so all year to supplement her study funds. She has told me that if I like any item of clothing I see, if she gets enough photographs of it, she will be able to make a passable copy. She's already made Laura and me a few blouses. The last pair were in a pale blue fabric with tiny daisies and pin pleated down the front. They look really good.

It was really sunny here today,  August 13^th; we just got back from an attempted otter watch, but with no luck on that front but we did see over 50 seals basking and playing.

We asked in the Kildonan hotel and the woman behind the bar gave us the address and number of a wildlife woman who is an otter specialist. I rang her after 6 pm that night as she was at work during the day. We arranged a meeting later next week to try and organise a time to go and see if we could spot any otters. (Seemed a bit complicated to me, but I think she may have wanted to ‘vet’ us…

OMG The Dockers got stuffed by the Budgies yesterday [15.08].   

We watched using Dad's password on "Watch AFL". Until the final quarter WCE were all over the Dockers. They played like a team of amateurs and frankly on the strength of the first three quarters they deserved to lose. I am so glad I wasn't at the Domain Stadium (Old Subiaco Oval) to watch it happen live.

I phoned Dad after the match and he was a bit unhappy. The Dockers are still top of the ladder though, eight points clear with only three games left to the Grand Finals.

On the 16^th we went  off to the Kintyre Peninsular again, more whisky buying. (Wildlife watching too perhaps...) we hopped on the earliest ferry to Claonaig and caught the last one back. We bought the Whiskey and whizzed down to the Mull to visit the places we had missed out last time. There were more seals here and masses of sea birds but none of those damned elusive otters. Maybe it is the wrong time of year?

We met up with the otter woman on the 18th Aug, she is much younger than we thought she’d be. We arranged a meeting for two nights hence. Watch this space...

The Otter Watch [20. 08] was cold, then colder, then bloody freezing.

It also went darkish, then darker still, then.... an Otter! A single solitary one, which is thought to be a female.

It got too dark to be able to see it after a while but it was great.

It came up about 50 metres away, on a rock at Kildonan. (In the water obviously...)

We went to the Kildonan Hotel afterwards to celebrate.

I may have to buy night vision goggles to watch again.

On the 21st we did dodging the spots and having a Spa Day. Two pampered ladies!

Our Spa was brilliant. We came out as fresh as daisies and smelling gorgeous. We met a couple of girls in there whom we got chatting to, Laura said she thought they were lezzies too and eventually we found out they were! We had a long lunch and chat (at the spa) about our experiences of 'coming out' and the whole lesbian psyche. Heather and Andrea met at University (Hull) and have been a couple ever since. According to them Laura is a Gold Star and I am a Hovis (bisexual) Lipstick Lesbian!

We took them round the island in my car yesterday (25th) as they are here without transport - using the Arran Bus. We spent all afternoon at The Kildonan Hotel watching the ships go past and the seals playing in the water. We were there for about four hours all in all. We actually watched a submarine sail down the Clyde! That was unexpected and quite sinister in a way.

I drove them back to Brodick, where they were staying, leaving Loll in Whiting Bay to prep our meal. When I got back she was a bit upset and it seemed that Andrea had tried to proposition her when Heather and I were ordering our first round of food and drinks. After much discussion and reassuring hugs we decided to just curtail our friendship with them. (They were scheduled to sail back to the mainland on Thursday.)

I had really enjoyed sitting and chatting and being silly and watching the ships etc and all the while my little dove was all of a flutter about being enticed away from me by this flighty trollop. I thought she had enjoyed herself as much as I had. I drove the two Hullensians back to Brodick because by about 5 the clouds rolled over from the west and we proceeded to get a thorough drenching; or we  would have, if we hadn't been in the hotel's huge conservatory.

I consoled Laura with a shared shower (and sex, obviously) and then we shelved the meal and went for an Indian Takeaway from Lamash (the next village along from Whiting Bay).

The next day we just ignored Heather and Andrea's calls and texts so I think they may have got the message. Luckily, even though we told them we had a place in Whiting Bay, we didn't spell out what or where it was and as I dropped Loll off at the shop before she went to prep our meal they would have had no way of finding us. Phew!

On Wednesday 26th we have dodged the spots at Brodick Castle and Arran Aromatics. I bought a complete set of Eydis perfumery as I have run out. The rain was a bit relentless at times.

On Friday 29^th we were up before the larks (4am) and headed to Kildonan beach. That is what the otter woman suggested when I contacted her again - as we had only seen one at dusk. We parked up at the west end of the front so we could go further along the shore towards Black Cave which is away from the village, the idea being that may be more productive. It was!  We saw another otter this morning. Out on the shore at Kildonan, heading westwards away from the settlement towards a place called Black Cave. We walked along the shore from Kildonan to Kilmory and were rewarded with a sight of one otter out on a rock and then swimming about and then returning to the same rock.

We saw the head first and thought it was a seal but when it climbed out onto the rock it was obviously not a seal. It stayed there for a few minutes then kept swimming off and coming back. Eventually it seemed to swim off and didn't return. It was a bit difficult to see clearly as the rock / otter was about 50 metres or so off the high water mark. It did get lighter as we stood and watched, and then sat and watched on our little tripod stool things, but it was too far away for my camera to think about getting a shot. Plus being a bit dark the exposure would have been a bit too long without a support of some kind.

We were severely chuffed with ourselves and kept hugging each other along the shore line until we reached the sandy bit at Kilmory.

We had a bit of a wait for the bus back to Kildonan but had a flask of hot tea to keep us going (and two sausage rolls each and some chocolate hob nobs).

Back at Kildonan we found the bar man from the Hotel looking out to sea with his bins, hoping to glimpse an otter but we told him it was further round the coast. He was amazed that we'd spotted one. 

We persuaded him to make us a pot of tea, then we ordered a full Scottish breakfast from the hotel's menu. Sitting in their conservatory we saw masses of seals but no otters! The breakfast was delicious.

We drove back to Whiting Bay and had a nap, as we had become overwhelmed with wishy washiness. We did get up at 4 am so it's only to be expected.

We were hoping to put some climbing in on Cir Mhor but the weather put paid to that, sadly.

As it looked set to be grotty for a few days we swapped our ferry ticket for the Sunday afternoon crossing instead and hit Dad’s at Tallentire by  tea time.

We drove ourselves back home to Sunny Sheffield on Bank Holiday Monday  morning. (Didn't it rain?) A word of advice, if you don’t have to drive on a BHM, then don’t. We whizzed down the A66, A1, M1 route and hit masses of traffic from Scotch Corner southwards. Arghhh!

We had a mountain of mail waiting on the kitchen table (good old Julie - next door neighbour) and an invite to tea at Mum's (the invite was on our answer machine).

Tony was there and he seemed really keen to hear about Arran and the seals and otters! He seems to get more palatable as a companion for Mum the longer we know him.

We all played at being the typical modern family, at one point in the evening I was on the laptop, Mum was on her laptop, Laura on her i-pad and Tony on his 'phone! Anyone looking through the window would have thought we were a really strange lot.

Good news on the AFL front: Fremantle won by 54 points against Melbourne and as the Budgies lost we  cannot lose the top spot on the ladder. rah rah rah!  We watched at Dad's on the Sunday night. It was a great game, very stirring. Dad thinks they'll not get through to the Grand Final though unless they buck their ideas up.

After we’d finished our individual computer session at Mum’s we adjourned to play bridge. Loll and I thought we should whup those amateurs... I had forgotten how good a bridge player Mum is, our hubris meant we very nearly lost!

I have re-read this and realise I have forgotten to mention all the walking we did on Arran. We walked Cir Mhor and Goat Fell. We traversed the Sleeping Giant and did the Catacol circuits again. The Doon was scaled and we relived our al fresco sex session on there. Just as good as the first time!

Naturally, Glenashdale Falls and the Giants Graves were done as one. We went to Kings Cross Point and several of the lower heights in the southern half of the island. We had one terrible discovery though… When the gin ran out there was nowhere on the island to buy another bottle! What a catastrophe! We bought two one litres bottle back in Sheffield when we got home.

Since our return we have now instigated a G&T time – the moment we walk through the door on an evening from work. We have even contemplated buying a Chinky Boo ice maker from Amazon but they are about £80, so maybe not.

Work has gone swimmingly. It is as though we have not been away. Loll is busily doing what she does in reprographics and has had her extended hours confirmed. I have been back on the plod plod plod of digitising old case files again. Yawn!

It is hard to believe that the new semester begins in a week’s time. OMG. This could be my final year ever as a student. What will I do?  I think I will adopt Micawberism – “something will turn up…”

Completed on Sunday 13^th September @ 11.15 am. Without the aid of a G & T (I had two actually, LOL)

Watching the cricket in Scarborough and Culture!

More catching up of backlog.

Friday July 3rd to Sunday July 26th Inclusive.

THE MAJOR EVENT - On Friday July 10th the student webpage at Uni went live with the end of semester results. A certain Miss Laura Thomas, of a distant Parish in Cumbria, who was reading Pure & Applied Mathematics gained a First Class Degree in that aforementioned subject. Why is this important? It means she will be doing a two year, part-time, Master's Degree in Mathematics (or at least a very specific branch of it). It also means she will continue to be part time at XXX & Y solicitors in the city, where I also have my part time job. Laura's hours there will increase to about 20 per week which will also give her a commensurate rise in salary. My hours are still 15 per week depending on my negotiations with the powers that be at Uni in September.

Musical events over the period: The 16 performing the Flight of Angels Choral Pilgrimage 2015 at the Cathedral in Carlisle. Works exclusively by Guerrero and Lobo. Absolutely sublime.

Things theatrical:

The Mousetrap at the Lyceum, Sheffield. I will not reveal the twist ending even though you can find it out on line. I had already seen the play, in London, with Mum when I was younger so I already knew and I challenged Laura to spot the culprit. She didn't!

The Woman In Black. This is its spiritual home, with the adaptation and first ever production performed here in the old Stephen Joseph theatre before it moved into the old cinema opposite the railway station. We saw this touring production in Sheffield (also at the Lyceum, as it happens) last year. It is still as scary. Yet again Mum and I saw this in London at the Fortune Theatre when I was about 14. I screamed at that performance, I am ashamed to admit. It scared the beejesus out of the whole school party who went to see it with Mum and I few weeks later, too!

Confusions. Also at the SJT. I had not seen this before and was very impressed and amused. The theatre is putting on a series of shows which are relevant to its 60th anniversary. This was part of that series.

Travel:

We saw the last two shows in Scarborough. We went up on Friday 17th and returned home last Tuesday evening, the 21st. Our real reason for the trip was to watch Yorkshire County Cricket Club's four day match at North Marine Road. They played Worcestershire and won! We saw the first three days only, having taken two days leave for the event. It was the first time Laura has been to a four day match. I have taken her to one dayers (usually disappointing form Yorkshire's point of view) and two T20s (extremely disappointing from Yorkshire's point of view). Last year I cam up for two days by myself, whilst Laura was visiting her folks but this year she said she'd like to come and see why I was so entranced by the game.

The fact Yorkshire were in the brown and smelly very early on, but fought back enough to post a total which meant when Worcestershire collapsed and had to follow on meant Laura watched some very enthralling and nail biting cricket. I did a sort of commentary for her on the first day, much to the amusement of the people sat around us. One old guy, who was obviously a bit of a wag, asked if I had ever thought of applying to test match special? Cheeky bugger!

She said she had enjoyed the experience, the proof will be if she agrees to come to another fixture in Scarborough next year. The weather on the whole was good. We didn't get wall to wall sunshine and blue skies but we did have weather conducive to good cricket. We sat in the North stand by the radio commentary box, right high up, which meant we were almost in line with the wicket. We snagged the same spot for each of the three days and by the end of the third day we had made a heap of new friends in the group sat close by, who also sat in the same places for those three days.

The 'wag' had been coming to the Yorkshire matches at Scarborough for years and years. He'd been through some of the 'Festival' Games too and recounted with pleasure how he had watched the West Indian players performing in a Calypso Band during a lunch interval way back in the 1990's. He distinctly remembered Ritchie Richardson playing bass guitar! 

Other points of interest:

Mum looked after Callie during our sojourn to Scarborough and even brought her back to my house and had a meal ready for when we arrived back on Tuesday evening. How good was that?

I bought tickets for the niece and nephew to see the Horrible Histories touring show in Sheffield, I gave them to my brother and wife and he thoroughly enjoyed it too. Maybe there is hope for him yet? I was sad to have missed seeing it but we had a clash of fixtures, as they say. I got two very nice hand made thank you cards from Peter and Angela afterwards which was a lovely surprise - you can guess that wouldn't have been Phil's idea!

Physical side: I haven't counted the number of lengths of the pool we've swum since my last entry, I could work it out but that would be even sadder, wouldn't it? We did some great climbing near Higger Tor again when the rain wasn't beating down on us as though we were getting another Flood to purge the world of the sinners!

Dad and Louisa (and baby Chloé) have headed up the caravan on Arran. We are all set to take over from them on the weekend of August 8th. We will share that weekend together and then Dad and Louisa head home, prior to a trip to Germany to show Chloé off to our rellies in Magdeburg, Saalfeld and Cochem. They are planning on being away three to four weeks. Luckily they have booked a DFDS crossing to Hamburg, which will avoid all the crap that's been happening at Calais for the last few weeks. The dogs are being looked after by Dad's friend Gilbert.

That's about it really. I have signed lots of petitions protesting about the Nasty things the Nasty Party are doing to the country now they have come to power. I have even posted something on Twitter! Steady the buffs, old gal!

Laura and I have indulged our passion with vigour and invention. She refused to make love in the grounds of Scarborough castle last week. Bloody good job, as the safe and secluded location I'd selected was overrun with a Brownie pack minutes after I had tried to inveigle my fingers into her undies! Phew, that was a lucky escape! She made up for her reluctance with interest later that night though. I imagine it would have been quite traumatic for a whole load of under 10 year old girls encountering two women having sex. God knows what it would have done to their little psyches? I know what it would have done to mine! I used to die of embarrassment at zoos and the like where animals were bonking, when I was a child. Funny how it didn't put me off trying it out for myself when I could find a safe guy to do it with, though. [I digress!]

Almost kissed by another woman?

Monday June 29th

Officially I am still at work until tomorrow, so I dropped Loll at XXX &Y and then put my nose in at Uni. I taped a note to the door with my mobile number on it and headed up to the solicitor's myself. I didn't expect anyone to call and I was right.

The office is a buzz with talk of what we are all doing during the two weeks shut down. (Technically it isn't, as there is a skeleton staff at work, but it seems like a shut down.) As you can imagine there are a huge range of destinations and activities planned. Canada is the furthest anyone is going. I guess two weeks are a bit restricting. Alison (and partner) are off to Iceland. I told her to take lots of photographs as I would love to got there too and it would be interesting to see what it's like. She thought doing a Small Planet Guide just for me would be a great idea, so that is on the cards. Isn't that sweet of her?

Truth be told not much else happened that warrants a journal entry.


Tuesday June 30th

A Radio Stars' song day today. I reposted my mobile number on my office door and headed up the hill to join Laura. We worked through lunch to gain extra time to zoom off to Dad's in a week and a bit - we are seeing The Sisxteen at Carlisle Cathedral on the 10th of July (Friday) so we are working like stink to gain the hours to take all of that Friday off.


Wednesday July 1st

Long Skype with Australia this morning. Jill has passed her driving test! She now has the green P plate on her folks' car for two years. She is obviously delighted. She was less than happy to find she isn't old enough to even think about a Light Rigid Licence which will allow her to drive the Camper Van. Suze kept making thumbs up gestures behind her. I think she is pleased her cherub can't wander off in the Camper just yet.

The girls were all excited about Freo's winning streak continuing and I was up in the air about Yorkshire Cricket Club beating Durham. Both teams are top of their tables and looking on course for glory. The AFL works in a different way to Count Cricket. Here is we finish top we are the winners outright. In AFL there is a play off system. Pretty silly if the team heading the league has lost only one game all season!

I am now officially at work with Laura until September. Rah rah rah.

Spent the day with Alison and her latest case research. (Well most of the day.) We had an awkward moment where I thought she was going to kiss me. I was pointing something out to her in one of our huge tomes and she turned her head to me. We were so close I could smell her breath (slightly minty) and I had this instinct that if I didn't look away she would kiss me. She was signalling the same way that Laura does before an oral assault. (I have learned to spot her tell-tale pattern over the years). In order to avoid any embarrassment I thought it best to be an ingénue in the matter. She isn't gay at all, what would happen if she did kiss me? Would it f*ck up my situation here? I can't risk that happening. In a way it is worse than what happened with Christopher, as we are roughly equal on the food chain but Ali is in the stratosphere compared to me!

I agonised all afternoon about what to do and decided the best course was to keep Mum and not say anything to anybody. It would not serve any useful purpose at all.


Thursday July 2nd

I just imagined the incident with Ali. I am sure I did. She wouldn't really have wanted to kiss me. I am just being stupid and have interpreted what one person does with me and assumed that another will do the same. I am just a stupid cow.

Laura is beginning to fret about her result. I tried to reassure her but it is only natural to think the worst especially as she has s much riding on the grade she achieves. I suppose the older we are the more we realise the importance of things like this. I was Miss Blasé about my results at school. I knew I was going to do well because I always had, and my work ethic and methodology hadn't changed at all. It proved a successful strategy for me. I guess Loll could have been undermined by her Dad's attitude but I am doing my best to make her see she has nothing to worry about.

As a species we are quite neurotic, TBH.

I prefer the erotic, though Uncle Tom's on his way, so that puts paid to eroticstuff for a while. (It's my OCD and cleanliness issues.) Speaking of OCD I managed fewer than 20 hand washes today. It was a challenge but I made it. I find it hard to explain to people how the compulsion to do something controls your life if you are not super strong willed about it. I am getting better, though. Even my Mum says I am not a wappy as I used to be. (If only you knew how wappy, Mum!)

I booked a room in Scarborough for our visit to the cricket, Friday 17th to Monday 20th inclusive. Mum has agreed to look after Callie for the weekend. The match doesn't start until Sunday so it gives us time to explore Scarborough and get in a couple of shows at the Stephen Joseph Theatre.. Loll is a bit unsure about going to watch a match over several days but I have tried to reassure her that she will be fine. I hope she is.

We had long, slow and loving sex tonight - a thing we often do before onset of Tom. The double ender combined with scissoring is amazing even though you can't get to kiss as much during the action.

Little deaths in the afternoon. (Orgasms are called little deaths, BTW)

Friday June 26th

It's over. The longest two weeks of my life ended today. (Actually we had a hiatus at the end of the final semester last year too, and that seemed equally as long! I suppose my gorgeous one does need time with her Mum & Dad once in a while...) I snuck off from Uni before lunch, collected the woofie from her palace and was in Cumbria by 2.30pm.

I texted Loll from Scotch Corner so she had an idea of the time I was arriving and I arrived at Dad's to find a naked, slender, blonde waiting in my bed! After three hours my fingers, tongue and important little places ached! (So did hers!)

As I knew Dad would be home at about 6 pm I set to and made the evening meal from stuff I'd found in my fridge, back in Sheffield, I even located some apple cake in the freezer (one of mine from March) so I defrosted that. Aren't cool boxes wonderful things?

When they arrived I helped take care of Chloé whilst Dad & Louisa unpacked and got themselves sorted after a week in Lancaster. I changed her, and then took her for a stroll in the baby sling round the village circuit, accompanied by Laura. She is still so cute and loves being bounced up and down in the sling. She's started to giggle when I do it. [Not broody, not!]

Back at the ranch the meal was cooked, laid out and ready when we got back so we tucked in whilst Chloé had a nap. (Oh - it was spicy home-made burgers, double fried chips and salad BTW, plus the apple cake.)

We went down to the pub at about 8 pm and were greeted as long lost strangers by the people we know  in there. They all thought Laura had been in Sheffield too, she must've kept a really low profile all fortnight. The number of younger people in the pub varies, I assume it is because most of them have now grown up and left home. Some of them are still living at home but they tend to head for the bright lights of Cockermouth on a Friday night instead of a sleepy old village! LOL

Dad is finished for the year (academic) now, too, and when we got back, over a mug of hot chocolate each, the focus of discussion was the occupancy of the caravan on Arran over the summer. We don't want to give my big brother the opportunity to use it as he refused point blank to join us in the venture but feels he has a right to ask to use it in the school holidays. Well, bugger that!

We arranged that Loll and I would go up on the second Saturday in August and that we'd stay until Tuesday 25th or Wednesday 26th depending on how we felt. Dad, Louisa and Chloé will be going up on the 9th of July for a month. We will have an overlap on the weekend when we arrive which will be nice. I foresee a delicious meal out together...

By filling up the van's usage over the summer we can claim, quite justifiably, that there won't be space for my sodding brother to freeload. Is that wicked of us? Maybe. But what the hell.


Saturday 27th June.

It was Laura's cousin's 21st party today. A weird affair which was a barbeque party starting about 5 pm and ending when the last guests departed. Helen is a student at Newcastle University, or I should say was, as she is now in the limbo period too, waiting for her result. I think it is a sign of how accepting some elements of Laura's family are that we were invited as a couple. Not everyone is as Caveman-like as Loll's Dad!

We bought her a Tassimo coffee maker for her pressie and she was overjoyed with it. (I mean we had asked what she'd like and then we bought what we thought would be best.) In order to let her use it immediately we had also bought her a double set of the disc things so she could make everyone a coffee if they wanted.

I actually drank a coffee for the first time in years. It was quite nice although I needed to add my daily allowance of sugar to make it so! Loll has wondered if we should get one too. I think we could as it does hot chocolate and tea as well, so she could have the foul coffee and I could have hot choc. Win win situation.

Helen's Dad thinks he is a barbeque expert, sadly he is mistaken - to a very large degree. He had this f*ck off big gas monster barbie  in the corner of the garden and spent from about 5.30 to 7.30 incinerating anything he put on it. We were told if we wanted to bring any speciality meat instead of burgers, sausage, kebabs and chicken we were free to do so. I decided to bring some of Mr Thompson's steak (it is wonderful) to eat instead of mechanically recovered meat products (or chicken), Laura concurred.

This almost caused a rumpus as I wouldn't let Davy cook it for me. he asked why not and I, unthinkingly, said, "...I don't want it crozzled to a crisp..." He got most offended by that and called Charlie over (his wife) to help intercede. I explained that I wanted the steak 'blue'. He didn't know what that was (neither did she). I explained that if I was frying it, I would place it in the pan for between 30 seconds to a minute on each side.

They both baulked at that and said it would be uncooked. When I told them that was exactly what I wanted they couldn't believe it. I said that I needed to be the one to cook it so it wouldn't get over cooked and spoiled. Davy was not a happy bunny but Charlie couldn't see the problem, in her words, 'if I wanted to give myself food poisoning then I ought to be allowed to do it' . What a fuss over such trivia.

I cooked my steak, and Laura's (although hers had two minutes each side) and we went away pleased with our meat. Charlie came over after a while and asked what it was like and we explained that it made it much nicer than an over cooked piece which became as tough as old boots. To her great credit she saw how much we were enjoying it and asked if she could try some. Laura gave her aunt a small sample from hers which was not as bloody as mine and she actually thought it was lovely! It was like a revelation to her that steak could be so tender and so tasty!

She did say that I had broken the cardinal rule of barbequing by insisting on taking over from the man doing the cooking (burning). I told her I knew it was a 'man-thing' in Australia, I hadn't realised it was the same over here too. She asked what my Dad was like over barbie-ing and I told her he was such a lazy git he didn't mind who cooked the food as long as it wasn't him. We had a good chuckle about that.

The one fortunate thing about the incident was that Laura's Dad (Davy's brother) didn't witness what had transpired. he could easily have used it as further evidence of my corrupting influence on his daughter - denying a man his right to turn perfectly good food into charcoal! LOL

Another brother, Tom, had brought along a 'Splat the Rat' game. (I digress here to enquire what sort of parent, whose surname is Thomas calls their son Thomas? I mean Thomas Thomas? Get real. [This is not the silliest Thomas I have heard of though. I visited a friend from Uni once who lived near Sleaford in Lincolnshire. They took me to see a gravestone in a churchyard of what had been a Gilbertine Abbey at Sempringham; the Thomas there had the surname Ato! Thomas Ato! Tomato? I mean, what were they thinking?]

Back to Splat the Rat. Tom had brought a drain-pipe attached to a pole, a small stick and a furry rat. The idea is he let go of the rat at the top of the drainpipe and you had to whack it as it appeared at the bottom. Simple? Erm... Not so simple after all.

We each had ten goes and there were prizes for the winners. I thought it would be fairly easy to allow for the speed that everything falls, a swift swipe with the stick on a count of one after Tom had released the rat should be enough to splat it. Mmm.... the best laid plans etc. After three hopeless missed I just decided to swing as soon as he let go of the rat. This proved a bit more successful and out of the remaining seven tries I splatted it three times.

My feeble score was recorded and we went round everyone at the party, there must have been almost 40 people there altogether. When we'd all had a go, including Tom himself, we had a three way tie for the winner: Laura, Lorraine and Lucy (quite a coincidence that, we all thought). They had to have a splat-off to see who won the big prize. Best of Five. Sadly the Lollster bombed out with only two splats. Lucy and Lorraine tied again on three each. This meant a sudden death decider. I don't know what had happened to their hand eye co-ordination but after five goes each, neither had hit the damned rat. Eventually Lorraine missed and Lucy splatted it to win the prize.  It was a tin of Minions chocolates. 2nd Prize were Minions Chocolate bars and third a Minions stationary set.

Despite being very childish and silly, it was great fun. Tom has been invited to three other parties if he'll bring his "Splat the Rat" game!

We drank an absolute swimming pool's worth of booze and as a result we were a little the worse for wear by about 11pm. It was still quite light but a bit chilly so the remainder of the group decamped into Davy's large summer house and squabbled for the few seats. Loll and I squeezed our torsos into a wicker chair and just snuggled. She sat half on my lap and half on the seat and we were thrown a blanket to wrap ourselves in against the chill. We gossiped for about a hour being silly and teasing and rude and annoying. At about 12.15 our taxi arrived and we bade our farewells and head back to Tallentire.

Imagine our surprise when on arriving the Aged-parent and his younger bride were sat up watching the Women's World Cup quarter final. It had just started. Dad asked us if we'd like a cuppa. We agreed and ended up watching the match all the way through. I had two mugs of hot chocolate and Loll had a couple of coffees.

England won; rah, rah and indeed rah! I was quite impressed, to be honest. It was just as quick as the men's game but there was none of that crappy prima donna-ism that those overpaid male footballer twats perform almost all the time.

I was pleased England had won. Which surprised me.

We were really late hitting the charp and because of the hour, the booze and the hot drinks swirling around in our tummies, we sensibly decided we could forego sex tonight.

That lasted until about 3am when a little voice said, "Vic... You awake?" I mumbled assent. "Oh good..." I was subjected to a ferocious assault on my important little places which meant I simply had to retaliate.


Sunday 28th June

Had a bit of a lie in today. I didn't appear from the pit until about 7.30! Callie seemed resigned to the fact her mistress was an immobile hulk in the bed and didn't even bother with the wet nose in the ear routine or, if she did, I was too soundly asleep to be cognisant of the fact.

As a penance for my over indulgence of the previous evening I took all four dogs for their first walk up Tallentire Hill - all the way to the Trig point. (Usually I get to the bench round the corner and stop for a rest then turn back.)

The Lakes looked wonderful and I determined to go to Smithy's Fell before lunch.

When I got back down there was the wonderful smell of cooking bacon wafting through the house and a surprised parent being the chef. I mentioned the idea of hitting Crummock and he was all for it to. So after a heap of bacon butties we trooped down to the Lanthwaite Wood car park in Dad's Land Rover.

It was idyllic. The woods were speckled with dappled sunlight,  piercing through the leaves, there was a coolish breeze and hardly any people about at all. We looked for red squirrels but spotted nary a one. We were surprised it was so quiet for 10 am! There were jut five cars in the car park when we arrived.

At the fish ladder we hit the water, with Loll and I wading out to throw sticks for the dogs to retrieve from the lake. Dad looked quite comical standing in his shorts and water shoes up to his knees in the Lake with his little daughter strapped to his chest in the baby sling.

I could tell he was aching to play with the dogs so I did a swap with Chloé and let him throw sticks and have a serious paddle about. I kept the bebé as we continued on round the shore, past the draw off tower and the fallen trees to the secret bay. Here we had more throwing of sticks and splashing about in the shallows for the humans.

Even Louisa joined in the stick throwing, which is something she doesn't often do. It was she who suggested we walked on round to the Kirkstile so we sallied forth to find the centre of the West Cumbrian Universe. It opens at 11 as usual on a Sunday but doesn't serve food until 12. We rolled up at about 11.25.

Louisa's rucksack was filled with the baby stuff, so I went and changed Chloé, then handed her back to her doting mother so I could settle down with a glass of red wine.

We ordered the Sunday roasts all round, except for the little one, of course. Yummy in our Tummy.

A leisurely stroll back to the tower and then round by the lake side again saw us arrive at a heaving car park at about 2pm. According to Dad he was the only one still awake by the time he'd gone under the A66 at Cockermouth!

At home we all joined baby Chloé for an afternoon nap (not literally, obviously - the cot's too small).

We zoomed back to Sheffield at about 7 pm.

Laura insisted on driving as I had seemed so sleep, I let her and guess what? I slept again!

At home, we did the usual trick of Loll dropping Callie and me off in Wharncliffe Side and then we walked back home giving the woofter her last walk of the day. I was expecting to just flop into bed but it seemed my wicked woman partner had other, more intimate ideas. Who was I to argue?

Watching the parachute fail !

Monday June 15th to Friday June 26th Inclusive.

Filling in the gaps again!

What a dozy idea: driving down to Sheffield early on Monday morning [15th]. I will have to be more sensible in future. The Leeds section was busier than anticipated and there were road works heading towards sunny Sheff. along the M1 but I was home by 7.45ish.

I fell asleep at my desk at Uni but was wide awake by lunch time. Feli told me she's off to France this weekend (a whole week early). Uni is a ghost town. The weeks seemed to be stretching endlessly before me!

Stats for the two weeks:

Number of dog miles walked during the 2 weeks - 65! (A dog mile is the same as a human mile but done with a canine companion.)

Number of laps of the pool swum - 1200. That is 6 kilometres of swimming. No wonder my muscles are toned and my tummy is flat!

Number of Skype sessions with Laura - 15. I know that's more than 12 days. We just had to have more. Seriously.

Number of Sex Skype sessions with Laura - 1. Unsatifactory. We got the giggles. We started off quite seriously but it descended into farce.

Number of self administered sex sessions - 28. I got seriously bored. The stick up toy proved a great distraction - this is the reason for the high numbers. I tried it stuck on the tiles in the bathroom (7/10); the wardrobe door (6/10 - burned knees); the lounge coffee table (10/10) and the kitchen floor (8/10).
I was sorely tempted to try the conservatory but the chances of being discovered far outweighed the  potential pleasure. My office door (6/10 it c kept coming unstuck); the office filing cabinet (9/10) and the office desk (8/10 - too high to be comfy).

Number of sets of batteries used in sex toy - 1. The black and gold vibrator is the toy of choice here.

Number of times I went to Mum's house - 3.

Number of meals out - 3 (all at Mum's).

Number of wins racked up by Fremantle Dockers since the start of the season -11 out of 12! Way to go Dockers!

Number of losses by Yorkshire Cricket Club since the start of the season - 0. Way to go Tykes. I hope to see a few days at Scarborough in July.

Number of hours spent gardening during the 12 days - approximately 6. I cut the grass; weeded the flower beds; dead headed roses and discovered the dog kennel roof needed re-felting.

Number of hours spent using the garden during the 12 days - about 16. A couple of hours per night when it was fine sitting out on the patio with a cuppa and the newspaper or book. Lovely.

I had a frantic phone call on the Friday 19th from Laura who had screamed at her Dad, packed her stuff and stormed off. She loaded her little car and was all set to come back to Sheff. The car's battery was flat! Her Dad jump started it from his car and then sat with her inside putting everything right again. In the end she stayed.

The argument was mainly about her doing a Masters degree. It morphed into her sexuality and then about me and my pernicious influence on her! Once the truce was brokered, in the car, she told her Dad that, if he ever revisited the things he'd said before she walked out, the next time she would remove herself from his life forever. Eric may be a West Cumbrian dinosaur but he knows his daughter and he knows she definitely means it. She looks all sweetness and light - and a hot as hell (in my eyes) but she is stubbornness personified. I am a laid back slacker in comparison.

That evening the family group (Eric, Molly, Stephen and Loll) plus my Dad, Louisa and Chloé all trooped off to the Whitehaven Air Show. They went in a two car convoy, with Laura driving them in her little Nissan. At the harbour they walked out onto the Lime Tongue with a fast food concoction for their meal all set to be entertained. The witnesses the Parachute Incident, where one of the Red Devils' chites went wonky and it looked like he'd plummet to his death. The audience reaction was one of palpable terror (her words) and they were really quite shocked. The crowd gave a cheer as the two men landed safely in the waters of the harbour.

It was all over the media for the next few days! Stephen had tried to film it all on his mobile phone but he only managed the bit where they hit the water and then were rescued.

It was the latter, rather than the argument which was the reason for Loll's frantic manner on the phone. I can thoroughly understand how she felt. You get the same feeling when watching a climber who slips and falls to the end of their belay.

On the Saturday after Laura's report I took Callie for a walk over to Higger Tor and Carl Wark across Stanage Edge. I parked at Hollow Meadows and did a 'there and back' stroll of about 12 miles altogether. It was weird to be at the rock but not climbing it.

The second week was even worse than the first in terms of feeling helpless with out My Girl. I think it must mean I have bad. Seriously bad. Which is good.

Number of days until Laura's exam results are available - 14. They are published on Muse at 2pm on Friday 10th July. She'll then access her HEAR which will have all sorts of details about what to do next. (The Uni is very efficient.)

Number of days until we both start full time at XXX & Y - 2. We begin this Monday, 29th June.

Number of days until we sail to Arran - 40. We have booked the earliest crossing on Saturday August 8th.

Number of days we'll be on Arran - 24, We return to Ardrossan on Tuesday 1st of September.

This was written after lunch (Kirkstile Inn) on Saturday 27th June. Next entry will have yesterday's details and the rest of the weekend.

Corny sex toy LOL

Friday June 12th

Only one day to go then Laura is finished with Uni (unless she gets the grade to do her Masters).

We went to the pool spot on 6am this morning, usually we are about quarter past the hour. It was almost deserted. Usually there are a handful of swimmers doing their laps. I was the one to break the water. Silly to be so pleased by such a simple thing. By the time we'd done our quota it was back to normal. I am always surprised how many people actually come down her this early in the morning.

Back home Laura has decided she is revised out. She is having a complete break from revision. I expressed deep regret as I have had an idea for a new sexual favour that I think we'll enjoy. She said that changed everything and she would go away for 30 minutes and pretend to revise so we could play around.

Sadly the sands of time were against us this morning but I promised I would return with a fire in my eyes and desire in my soul. She said that sounded promising.

Uni was deserted. It was a bit like a ghost building, with the odd lost soul wandering around as though trying to find the way into the next circle of hell. We have just about hit our deadline to finish all the translations by the end of the semester. I think there will be two or three left at most, especially if Feli skives off to France early, as she is wont to do at the end of the semester. (I don't know how she gets away with it!)

I skived off too, at about 3pm to go and pleasure my blonde goddess. As her final exam is tomorrow, we weren't rushing off up to Cumbria so we had several hours to indulge our passion before meal time.

Laura assured me she had revised and revised and revised until she was all revised out. I said in that case I had a little something for her. We headed to the bedroom where I undressed her and made her lie on the bed. I told her she had to put on the eye mask (an emirates one from our journey to Aus last summer) and spread eagle herself. She obliged. I quickly took out the lengths of cloth from my bedside drawer and used them to first tie her hands to the bed frame and then her ankles to the casters at the foot of the bed. The strips are pretty good as we have a slipknot to go round the wrists and ankles which doesn't make the material cut into the flesh but is impossible to wriggle out from.

She told me we had done this before, but I was able to tell her not quite; something new would happen, in time.

I am not sure how much detail to go into here: suffice to say phase one involved me exploring her slowly and carefully, phases two saw me straddling her. Phase three I swiveled round so we could reciprocate. When I considered she was sufficiently prepared I introduced phase four, a new toy. She had to guess what it was.

It was a corn on the cob. Not too long but fairly wide in diameter and very knobbly. It took her only a short while to work out what it was and she declared the nobbles were driving her crazy. A bit of manual stimulation  and movement of the vegetable ended with the blonde head was thrown back in total abandon.

I untied her and she did exactly the same to me.

Was it a good idea, or what?

We have decided that a visit to the Ann Summers website is in order, to try and find something with even more knobbly ridges in its surface.


Saturday 13th June.

Laura's last exam and then we sped like buggery to Cumbria. Dad took us out for a swift bite at the local pub when we had settled in and then began discussing plans for a boat trip on Ullswater tomorrow. It seems there is a new landing stage opened on the shores of Gowbarrow - about bloody time there was a northern shore one apart from Pooley Bridge. This means a great deal for walkers in the area.

Lol went to see her Mum and Dad after we had scoffed and then came back to ours after an evening meal with the family.

The exam, the drive, the meal and the time with family meant she was absolutely pooped. She kept falling asleep in the armchair, so I bullied her into walking the wolf pack up Tallentire Hill before having an early night.

She was so tired we didn't even make love before we fell asleep.


Sunday June 14th.

I was awakened quite early by a pair of exploring hands, one teasing a nipple and one attempting to tickle my tummy button - from the inside! Naturally I responded in kind and we spent a good hour and a half getting thoroughly orgasmed out! We snoozed afterwards and were rudely awakened by an Aged Parent knocking at the door to see if we wanted a cup of tea. It was 8.15! I can't recall the last time I was this late in getting up.

Our Ullswater plan was to sail to Gowbarrow, stroll from there to Pooley and catch the ferry back to Glenridding. It was a plan that was magnificent in its simplicity. Taking La'l Beb may have been a walk to far. We had to lug the baby bag with us, as well as her feed and bottle [Louisa is having a lactation problem].

The ferry's hooter scared her witless and she bellowed loud enough to drown the hooter. By the time we got to Gowbarrow she was fine again. We all trooped dutifully round Aira Force although Louisa wasn't too pleased with me gamboling down the steps from the top bridge with a baby srtapped to my front. I could sort of see her point, but I am a very fit and well balanced (as in I don't fall over easily) young lady so I didn't even think it would be an issue.

The walk along from Gowbarrow to Pooley needs some money being spent on it too, not all that good to be honest but a fine late lunch in the Sun Inn made up for a trudge.

We caught the ferry back which afforded us more time on the water out of the weather, which had become a tad inclement. Chloe didn't bellow at the horn this time, although that could have been because we were below deck and the sound was muffled.

I could believe the number of people at Glenrdidding when we disembarked - but then, it was a Sunday afternoon in June, so it's only ro be expected.

I pleased Laura by deciding to drive back down to Sheffield early on Monday morning, that meant she would be able to stay with me rather than have to kip at her Mum & Dad's house. She and Eric can have really serious fall outs!

If the truth be known I was rather in dread of going back down all by myself and being alone for almost a fortnight. How on earth will I cope?

Greasing the nipples...

Tuesday June 9th

Another day, another dollar.

Had a call from Kaybers today, she Jan and Hanne are back in Sunny Sheff and could they call?
Could they call? What a daft question.

We arranged that they should come round for a meal with us tomorrow and we can catch up on all their gossip. It has been ages since I have seen my best friend from school. I am so looking forward to hearing all about Norway.

I think it is a good job I hadn't discovered the allure of lesbos when we were at school together as I would definitely have tried to seduce Miss Kay. I am not sure how well she actually agrees with my newly discovered (in our terms) sexual liberation.

Loll is on the final straight for her exams. She has two more left to do, her last one is Saturday and then she is free from the shackles of academic life, for as long as she wants to be. Offering sexual favours after each revision session has been wonderful if a little taxing on my imagination. I did say I would try to never do the same sex act twice, the thing is, she most enjoys the 69 where I manage to insert two fingers from each hand at the same time and then, using my forehead, push a vibrator inbetween them. The only way we have varied this is to use our full range of vibrators and dildos in the same position, which Laura deemed as being different each time.

Dad called to tell me his 2CV has failed its MOT. Boo hoo. Apparently it needs new kingpins. I sort of knew it. I remember reading the manual when I borrowed it in the sixth form and university and I religiously looked after all of its little foibles. One of which was regular greasing of its nipples (no don't even think about it). I am ever the practical young lady. Plus this is so easy to do. I asked Dad when he had last done this and he replied that he couldn't ever remember doing it!Well, durr Dad!

The plus side is the local Citroen garage will be able to replace the miscreant kingpins at a reasonable price.

One of the things I used to love about that little car was driving it in the Lake District, you sort of felt much more a part of the scenery than you did in other vehicles. Especially when you had the roof rolled back.

Wednesday 10th June

Kaybers and Jan and Hanne came round for tea. Laura played hostess for a while until I arrived from XXX & Y. We had decided to cook a salmon en croute or them. One of our favourites. It was almost ready when I rolled in.

Hanne is so grown. I haven't seen her for ages, so the difference is quite pronounced. She is roughly the same age as Sophie (Phil and Jane's youngest) but with Sophie I have not really noticed her grow up as I see her so often.

We had an enjoyable meal and I have learned a great deal more about Norway than I ever did before. I have also learned that Kaybers is homesick for the UK when she's out there. I suppose the language barrier is a bit isolating. They are teaching baby Hanne Norwegian and Kaybers is learning alongside her so that is helping to some extent. What she wasn't ready for was the winter. There was so much snow and the cold was (in her words) unbelievable. I have the impression that she would much rather be back in the UK full time rather just on passing visits.

I was also a bit disturbed by the lack of affection I received from her. We used to be very tactile, in a non-sexual, best friendy sort of way, it seemed that was all in the past. Yes, we hugged but it seemed a bit perfunctory on her part. Maybe I am reading too much into her actions. (I do over think things!)

After a few bottles of wine (although not for Jan, her was on driving/baby duty) we ended up a bit more like we had been in the days of our dynamic duo act in Norwich but it seemed there was always something holding her back from being her proper old self with me.

As they were leaving, past midnight, with a take-away baby fast asleep in her cot, Kaybers asked what we would be doing after Loll's final exam. I explained the two weeks with her Mum and Dad and sketched in our plans for the summer. She said, "Well, that will give you time to evaluate your situation, won't it?"

I mean, What?

I haven't mentioned this to Laura at all but I sure as hell am going to contact Kaybers again, when Laura is up at her Mum and Dad's and find out what the fuck it meant.

In the cold light of day, I think, she may be missing the old, wilder, less 'establishment' Victoria she remembered from her school days. I bloody hope so.


Thursday June 11th

Had a booking spree with shows at the theatre today and have several things booked for July. We have avoided August as that is when we are planning to be in Arran. One interesting juxtaposition is the concert with Tchaikovsky's Romeo & Juliet overture followed, in the next week, by the play itself!

I phoned Mum to see if she wanted any tickets and she will be coming with us to a few of the shows. She thinks that Kaybers has been affected by Jan:. he may see me as a potential threat to their relationship because now I have discovered this new facet to my sexuality he may worry that I may think that Kaybers could be fair game. I told her that was complete bollox but she said it was a definite possibility. He had always seemed very uptight about our touchy feely sort of relationship before they were husband and wife. Now that I am in a serious relationship with another woman he may feel our previous schoolgirl friendship could turn into something else. It is not about what he feels for me rather than how insecure he is about his wife. Mmmm.... Interesting. I made her promise not to tell Laura anything about it.

Another call from Dad today. I am impressed. The new landing stage on Ullswater is officially opening this weekend and did we want a cruise and lunch on Sunday? Did we ever? It's been put in by the National Trust and is at Gowbarrow. Rah rah rah. I can't wait.

A very quiet day really.

Stats for hiatus period. Including naughties!

Monday May 18th to Monday June 8th

Yet another hiatus. I must get my self sorted out so that I am not too busy to add entries to this damned blog.

I know I have taken on too much really, especially the GCSE and A Level tutoring, which way back last September seemed like a good idea but in retrospect it has taken up so much more time than I imagined it would.

Things we've done over hiatus period:

Lengths swum at the pool: 1500! Phew it looks a lot written down but doing them isn't so tricky. It is no wonder we are two fit young ladies. (Is 28 still young?)

Concerts attended: None. Although we have bought our 2015/2016 International Concert Season tickets already (13 of them). We gave Mum the two Christmas Concert tickets - Brass bands? No thanks!

Times visited Dad's: Twice.

Times visited the Lakes National Park. Twice - once to Rannerdale to see the bluebells.

There is a wonderful doddle of a walk which starts at the foot of Rannerdale Knotts (Limited parking) takes you up Rannderdale, past the bluebells. You hit the col where one path leads along to the summit of the Knotts one up to Grasmoor and one down to Buttermere. Take the Buttermere one - it is a steep descent! In the village there is a great little cafe and two pubs. I tend to use the cafe. After a refreshing cuppa and a piece of cake stroll on down through the car park to a path which leads to the lake shore. This is idyllic. Follow the shore eastwards to cross the road and join a path which countours along the lower slopes of Rannerdale Knotts back to the car par. Gorgeous two hours stroll!

2nd time to Crummockwater and The Kirkstile Inn - for lunch. I could do this with my eyes shut! Beef baguette and chips. With a glass of their house red.

Conversations with Dad about a new job advertised at my Uni: One. Dad's advice - put in an application.

Meals out: Eight.
Kirkstile Inn Loweswater.
The Bell Vue, Papcastle
The Bar n Bistro, Gilcrux
Z on the harbour, Whitehaven
The Old Horns Inn, High Bradfield
Lokata Meze Bar, Sheffield
Dining Club May - Sue's House
Dining Club June - Colette's House

Number of documents left to translate in our cache at work: 25!

Walks done in the Peak District National Park: 3.

Agden Circuit.
Bradwell to Bakewell. (Using public transport out to Bradwell and back from Bakewell).
Higger Tor and Carl Walk.

Meals At Mum's; 2.

Us hosting meals: 4.

Mum and Tony x 2
Phil, Jane and kids x1
Steve and Ann x1

Theatre visits: 1
Pride & Prejudice, Lyceum. June 5th. Accompanied by Mum & Tony.

Number of normal dog walks. ie First thing in the morning, back from work, last thing at night: 63. As each of these is at least a mile this is another reason why I can still wear clothes I bought when I was 18!

Number of times house cleaned; Four.

Number of sexual favours granted for revision schedule adherence: 25.
Most preferred sexual favour: Oral stimulation of genitalia to orgasm.

Number of  'ordinary' sex acts between us: 18.

Number of laundry washes: 8.

Amount of underwear washed in named time period: 52. (26 sets each)

Number of different outfits worn in named time period: 75+

Amount of Alcohol consumed in named time period: Lost count.

Books Read: 12
TV watched (hours): 36
Music Played (in CDs): 140+

Number of times we watched the orbiting International Space Station: 4. Including one where we went out to the ridge above High Bradfield with our spotting scope and were able to see it in close-up. It goes over so quickly!