Tuesday May 5th
Election fever sweeps the city. Ha ha ha. I would be mistaken if I said everyone I meet is fired up and ready to vote on Thursday. Sadly, a lot of apathy seems to be prevalent. Maybe all the undergrads have been listening to Russell Brand. I am keen to get in that booth and try to get rid of the fat, rich, out of touch, millionaire, bastard Tories but I seem to be in a minority among my peers, students and colleagues. It is worrying. Most of them are either in denial or are just plain wrong about the facts. I blame the press and the fucking Tories themselves for lying to the public for years.
Here are the facts: (Verifiable)
The crash was Not caused by Labour - it was caused by fucking Tory wanker bankers. Labour bailed out the banks to avoid several collapsing.
We were not in recession at the time of the election in 2010, the recession Officially Ended in September 2009!
The second recession was caused by George the c*nt Osborne and his fucking stupid austerity package which plunged the UK into recession, again, for three years!
The same lying bastard c*nt Osborne said the deficit (which is only a bloody paper deficit anyway - and which we have always carried to some degree) would be cleared by 2013. He fucking failed. he then revised his date for clearing it to 2015, he fucking failed again. His latest estimate is 2018 - he will fucking fail again!
The only people to be materially better off during the parliamentary period are the RICH. They have got progressively richer whilst everyone else has got poorer (in relative terms).
The NHS was ordered to make £20 billion of saving by another Tory c*nt, Jeremy Hunt. No wonder it is in in fucking turmoil. 'Savings' actually meant cuts. Sandi Toksvig was right when she said the Tories put the 'n' in cuts!
If these bastards are elected on Thursday, the whole country is fucked, the NHS will be well and truly fucked and the poorest in society will suffer even more. (OK, the last one is not a Verifiable fact but all the rest are.)
On a less angry note, Laura has her exam timetable. Once again the exams are in venues dotted about the city and yet again she has a Saturday morning exam. Her first in on June 1st and the last on June 10th. Her exam revision timetable is working well. She is doing small chunks of revising sandwiched with a break and a mind rest. I volunteered to help with the mind rests and she told me that she would like to have sex in some way, of her own devising, in at least one of them every day. That's fine by me. Therefore I am to be her sex-slave for the remainder of her revision - it's a really hard job but I think I will cope. I will not go into details but so far we have been very busy and inventive.
My GCSE pupil's exams start in May with English Literature and then the Language papers are in June. My A Level pupils are taking AS papers on the 20th of May then they are having a break until September, which seems a good idea.
I learned something quite shocking over the weekend, from Dad, Louisa's post partum bleed resulted in her having a hysterectomy. I have no idea why he shared that information with me but he did. All I could say to him was, "Ah.. Um.." pretty useless really. There are times when I seriously wonder if all this sodding menstruation is the best way to have our reproductive system organised. If there is such a thing as god (which I know there isn't) it would be incontrovertible proof his gender was male. Only a bloke could dream up such a stupid system!
Wednesday 6th May
Had a normal day at both jobs and then spent the evening at Mum's. She has invited Tony over as well and we had a pre-election post mortem on the campaign. The really, really bad news is that Tony is a fucking Tory voter. We ended up having a huge argument with him. He didn't believe any of my facts and started to get personal in his argument so I took out my tablet; found each piece of data and presented all the evidence to him. That shut the bastard up!
I am afraid I upset my Mum with being so horrible to her new(ish) boyfriend. He said he thought he ought to go but I stopped him and told him we should go instead, Mum and I are in agreement over our politics even though she kept out of the argument. I told him that it was more important that he stayed rather than us. So we did.
We hadn't even made it to Totley when Laura's phone rang; it was Mum asking us to come back. Tony and she had started to discuss their position over politics, after we'd left, and they'd argued too!
I grovelled before Mum and said that I was really, really sorry for being such an arrogant little cow. She told me that I had nothing to apologise for and that it was Tony who was in the wrong. They had agree to differ over their politics but she was livid about the way he had rubbished my arguments and beliefs, turning a discussion into a personal attack. Even more so because I had kept my cool and proved every one of my assertions about his beloved Tory Party wrong!
During our 'discussion' I had been quite alarmed at Callie's reaction. Although she didn't do anything, I guess she sensed the atmosphere and she kept uttering a low gutteral growl from time to time as though she was ready to spring to my defence.
We ended up kipping at Mum's. It being Uni for me the next day and revision central for Laura we were happy to stay and I confess we got rather the worse for wear on Mum's part of Hilmar's wine.
Before we hit the charp Mum had a text from Tory Tony to apologise for his behaviour and to ask her to send his apologies to me as well. Seems he might not be a bastard after all. In bed later Laura had a better insight, she was of the opinion that he didn't want to lose access to Mum's vagina. I was shocked!
Thursday 7th May
Polling Day.
This is the first general election I have voted in where I have actually gone into a polling station and scribbled my X on a piece of paper. Previously I have had postal votes or I haven't voted at all. (In 2010 I was in Australia - touring the country in Suze & Pete's camper van and had absolutely no inclination to vote. I believed I would be staying in Warnbro indefinitely.)
Loll dropped me off at Uni and then whizzed home with the woofie and promised to collect me at four pm. I had the next batch of undergrads to see as part of my Pastoral Support Programme. I saw eight of them today. They are mostly in a panic about end of semester exams, unless their course is modular, when they exhibit a sort of pre-end of season euphoria.
Feli and I had lunch in the Indian restaurant and she blew her head off asking for a hot Balti! Serves her right. She had two bowls of riata to help her cope! She is planning her summer in France already. I am not up to date with her latest "Man Situation" as she seems to have been keeping me in the dark. Perhaps she is sulking because she didn't get an Invite over to Arran during the Easter break. I have offered her a room and tour of the island in the summer but she isn't sure whether she'll be here or back home in Arcachon.
Loll arrived spot on 4pm and insisted I lock the door of my minute office and then proceeded to demand immediate oral sex. Who am I to argue? I was all for deferring the return favour as I had been a bit hot all day and not as fresh as she was - obviously having showered before coming to collect me. She waved that aside, attacked my privvy part with a couple of baby-wipes and sent me into orbit too.
Suitably fired up we arrived at our polling station at just before 6pm to put our marks in the box. I voted for Elaine Smith (no relation) I have met her and she seems to be a sensible woman. I hope her party and the SNP are able to drive out the Tory Scum. I predict that Nick Clegg and his lot will end up being toast after tomorrow but Labour should do OK, unless the morons who vote UKip fuck everything up.
Mum phoned just before our A Level pupils arrived to tell us that Tory Tony had sent her a huge bunch of flowers to make up for yesterday evening, she told me I would be getting a smaller version too. Is that good or does it make him a mega creep?
After a pre-bed shower we had a repeat performance of this afternoon's activities in my office. God may have got it wrong about our periods but giving us the facitilty for multiple orgasms sort of atones for that mistake! BIG TIME!
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